Series: Balls to the Wall , Book 4.0
By: Tara Lain | Other books by Tara Lain
Published By: Etopia Press
Published: Dec 07, 2012
ISBN # 9781939194312
By: Tara Lain | Other books by Tara Lain
Published By: Etopia Press
Published: Dec 07, 2012
ISBN # 9781939194312
Word Count: 38,718
Available in: Adobe Acrobat, Mobipocket (.mobi), Epub
Snow Balls (Balls to the Wall) by Tara Lain - Romance>LGBTQ>Gay eBookCan a man pretend to find true love?
Big, handsome, and hunky, JJ LaRousse looks like an alpha male but acts like an interior decorator. And he’s trying to be happy about it--until a robbery at the famous Laguna Winter Fantasy brings JJ face-to-face with tough cop, Ryan Star. JJ hears Ryan likes guys who are manly men, so he drops his voice an octave, colors over his pink hair, and tries to pass as a football fan. After all, his father always said he should be more macho.
Ryan Star may be tough, but he hides in the closet at work. He learned in New York that being a gay cop can cost you your life. His attraction to the big, handsome JJ threatens his anonymity, but he can’t seem to resist. JJ is just his type. But when JJ goes skiing and comes face to face with his greatest nemesis, all the secrets come out of the closet. Can Ryan love JJ for who he really is? More importantly, can JJ?
Reader Rating: 4.1 (15 Ratings)
From Top to Bottom Reviews"I've read a lot of series over the years. Some of them I've liked more than others, but I can honestly say that Ms. Lain's Balls to the Wall series is one of my favorites! She has a knack of writing humanly flawed and fabulously sexy men who really live and breathe off of the written page." --5 Stars
Excerpt:Chapter One“Oh my God. Rodney, did you hear about the robbery? I saw them. I saw them.” JJ knew his hands were fluttering, but he couldn’t help it. At six foot four and one ninety-eight, fluttery hands were an incongruity, but sometimes his emotions won. Sometimes? Well, maybe all the time.“Take an end before I drop it.” Rod’s short arms could barely grasp the edges of the giant painting, and it tipped precariously as he approached the booth. Rodney Mansfield’s small stature didn’t match his enormous personality.“Sorry.” JJ grabbed the painting with one hand and lifted the burden from the little artist. He glanced at the semi-impressionistic portrait of a drool-producing nude man lying on the grass in the sun, his big, relaxed cock illuminated by a ray of sunshine. Why couldn’t he find a guy like that? Well, maybe not lying on the grass nude, but a special guy. But then, having a partner meant taking care of someone and that was so not his forte.He set the canvas on the floor of the booth at the back beside the boxes of little clownish dolls they were hoping to sell for holiday gifts at the Winter Fantasy Art and Craft Show.Rod leaned against the sales counter and pulled off the bright aqua scarf he had wrapped around his neck three times. It might be December, but it was still a good sixty-five degrees outside. California winter. “Yeah, I heard people talking about the robbery when I came in. What’s up, darling?”JJ flopped down on a wooden crate that held more items from the gallery for the booth. “These two guys dressed like Santa Claus and an elf apparently came in early this morning when people were just starting to set up. Everybody thought they were part of the Santa’s village display, so nobody suspected anything until Suzanne and Ollie saw them hanging around some of their jewelry boxes. Before Suzanne realized what they’d done, the guys had stolen expensive stuff from them and a bunch of other booths, too. When they went to look for them, the two men were gone.” He took a deep breath. “But I saw them!” His hands started to flutter, and he curled them into fists. “They came right by here. I even talked to them!” He fanned his face. Fluttering again.Rod reached out and grasped JJ’s hands. He smiled. Rod was so great at calming him down. JJ LaRousse might be a drama queen, but Rodney knew how to handle him. “What did you say to them?”“Something about where they’d left their reindeer and weren’t they traveling a little early.”Rod stared at him intently. “Did they answer?”“Yes.”“And what did they say?”“The big guy, Santa, said their sleigh was double-parked and you know how tough the meter maids are in Laguna. Oh hell, I laughed. Damn.”“You’re going to have to tell all this to the police.”JJ sighed. “I know. A cop in a uniform came over and said that a detective will be here soon to question me.” He pulled his hand from Rod’s grasp and started fanning again. He just couldn’t help it.Rod pointed to the back wall. “So let’s get the painting hung and you can set up the rest of the booth. That’ll take your mind off it.”“OK.” Rod always knew what to do. JJ stood up and grabbed a hammer and hook he’d brought for the purpose. With Rod’s guidance, the gorgeous painting by Roman, the nom de plume of Rodney Mansfield, soon dominated the back wall of the booth. They probably wouldn’t sell it here, since most people attending the exhibition were looking for Christmas gifts, and a fifteen thousand dollar painting wasn’t exactly a stocking stuffer. But it would attract people to the gallery later.Rod stepped back. “Looks great.” He pointed at JJ’s head. “Hey, I like the new do.”JJ patted a hand against his longish hair. He’d dyed it pink that morning from its usual brown. “I had a great role model.” It was true. Rod was JJ’s best example for how to be himself.Rod laughed and flipped his red-and-green bangs. “I’m doing a holiday motif, darling.”Voices sounded from two booths down. “Ma’am, I’d like to ask you a few questions if you wouldn’t mind.” JJ shivered. Was he scared of the police, or reacting to that low, gravelly voice? He walked to the edge of the booth and peeked around the corner. Sweet dreams of baby gay boys—that was a hunk. JJ pulled back and started fanning.Rod glanced up from his inspection of a piece of sculpture. “What?”JJ hissed. “Look. Oh my God, look at what’s coming to question me.” The fanning hand moved so fast it was probably invisible.Rod stepped out into the walkway in front of the booth. The man knew no fear. Of course, he was a black belt in karate, but still. The little artist glanced toward the neighboring display, then walked casually back into the booth. He lowered his voice. “I’ve seen that guy before. A Laguna cop. But I think he’s some big city transplant from New York City or something.”“Holy shit, don’t tell me that.” JJ was going to faint.Rod shook his head. “Come on, he’s just going to ask you some questions.”“I know. OK, yes.” Deep breath.Rod lowered his voice to a whisper. “Besides, I think he might be gay.” Rod grinned like a canary that ate the cat.“Oh God, be still my heart.”Rod laughed. “Clearly, darling, you’re also a member of Alpha Males Anonymous.”JJ sighed. “But you and David both got your alphas. In fact, David got two!” His boss, the gallery owner, David Underwood, had partnered with the two hunkiest Australian volleyball players God had ever created.“Yes, darling. And so will you.” He grinned. “Well, maybe not two. We’re not all that lucky.”JJ shook his head. “I don’t know what I want. I mean, look at me. Everyone thinks I’m an alpha male. You’d expect me to be carrying a football instead of picking out sofa fabric. The only guys who like me are twinks looking for someone to take care of them.” But he knew he couldn’t take care of anybody. He’d sure proven that in his life. He tossed a piece of straw off the counter. “Besides, I don’t know if I like the tough, alpha types. They scare me. Oh hell, I don’t know anything. I really want a partner, but I play around. I can’t help myself.”“You’re only twenty-three. Give yourself a break.” Rod winked. “And you’re not looking for a type. You’re looking for a person.”JJ smiled. Rod always made him feel better. “Thanks. You really are as smart as they come.”“So are you, darling. Sometimes you just let your emotions overrule your head.” Rod leaned in and said softly, “I saw that cop at a bar one time with a guy who could have just been a buddy. I mean the other man was as straight-looking as they come. Football player type, you know? But it was a gay bar in Santa Ana. So you figure it out.”“Wow.”Rod looped his scarf once around his neck. “I have to go back to the studio. I’ve got a model coming in at noon, and then I’m having a late lunch with my honey. He doesn’t have many classes today.”JJ frowned. “Damn. I was hoping you could stay while I answered the cop’s questions.” He took a deep breath. “But say hi to Hunter for me.”“You’ll do fine. Kiss-kiss, darling.” Rod smooched the air, gave JJ a hug, which came to his upper chest, and walked out of the booth with that cocky stride of his. It would be great to be more like Rodney. Brave and feisty, daring the world to criticize him. Yes, and having the most beautiful ex-firefighter turned teacher in all of southern California as a lover. Why couldn’t he find that kind of love? Oh well.JJ peeked around the corner again. The cop was right next door, and the quick glance took JJ’s breath away. Why? The guy was nice enough looking, but not some drop-dead gorgeous movie star. Medium height with short dark hair, a lean build, and slightly pockmarked face. There was something that radiated off him though. Power or certainty…something.JJ stared up at the morning sun. So Rod had seen this cop in a gay bar with a straight-looking guy. JJ fanned himself. He looked at the hand and clenched it into a fist. Hell, he was straight-looking as long as you didn’t spend five minutes with him. But that cop was about to get up close and personal. Could he do it? People always expected him to be tough and masculine. Maybe he could fake it. Did he want to? He’d spent so long finally accepting who he was. Still…maybe just once.The kid who took tickets at the front gate ambled by.JJ waved. “Ralphie.”The big kid turned. “Hi, JJ.”JJ wagged a finger toward him and Ralphie came into the booth. JJ whispered, “Could I borrow your baseball cap?”“And cover up that great do? Hell, man, why do that?”JJ shrugged. “The police. You know.” He pointed at his head.“Oh yeah. The gay thing. Sure, no problem.” Ralphie handed it over and JJ popped the USC cap over his pink streaks. “How’s it look?”“You’re positively collegiate, buddy.”Yeah, US College of Decorators! “Thanks. I’ll bring it back before I go.”“AOK.” The kid left at the same sauntering pace.He grabbed his jacket and slipped it on, then took a deep breath. Why was he doing this? Well, he could say he didn’t want the cop to think he was a stupid ninny whose eyewitness account couldn’t be trusted. Yeah. That was it. His story and he was sticking to it.He bent over and started pulling more of the small dolls out of the box. Something moved in the tissue. Oh God, a spider! He threw the paper across the booth, jumped back, and fanned himself while the eight-legged foe crawled into the sawdust-covered pathway. “Good. Go.” He flicked his hands. JJ hated to wish for the spider to get stepped on, but those were the facts.Try again. Deep breath. Calm. Channel Steve McQueen. Well, maybe not that far.He looked at the beautiful Christmas village he’d set up on a large side display table complete with skaters on the mirror pond and tiny decorated trees. Carefully, he placed the art objects into the scene. These dolls would bring in the money during Winter Fantasy because people could afford to give them as gifts. An original piece of art at a reasonable price. It was a great find for shoppers. He nestled a lovely red-and-green doll into a forest of tiny pines.“That’s really pretty.”“Oh.” JJ almost dropped the doll. He grabbed it firmly, placed it, breathed, and turned toward the husky voice. Showtime.The cop raised the corners of his mouth slightly. “Sorry. Didn’t mean to startle you.”Could he try out his own deep voice? JJ cleared his throat and dropped his tone from the usual stratosphere. “Not a problem. I wasn’t paying attention.” Blue. The guy’s eyes were a deep blue. Up close, his face had a classic structure that looked like it had been wrecked a bit. A high-bridged nose with a slight crook as if it had been broken, creamy skin marred by a few orange peel-like marks, a light scar from the upper part of his neck that curved over his jaw. Scary. Ummmm…and sexy.The policeman took out a small notebook. Just like in the movies. “I’d like to ask you a few questions about what you saw today.”JJ took hold of the edges of the counter so he could keep his hands still. “OK.” He tried again, an octave lower. “Sure. Shoot.”The guy flipped a page of the notebook. JJ stared at him and the question burst out. “Uh, what’s your name?”The guy looked embarrassed. “I’m so sorry. I should have identified myself. I just…uh, I’m Detective Star.” He flashed his badge.“What Star?”“Excuse me?”“What’s your first name?”“Oh. Ryan.”JJ smiled. “Nice name. I’m JJ LaRousse.”The detective looked a little confused but he wrote it down. “One S or two?”“Two. And the JJ stands for Jamison.”“So Mr. LaRousse—”“JJ.”“JJ. Can you tell me where you were this morning at nine forty-five?”JJ’s eyes widened. “Do you think I did the robberies?” He held the counter really tight.“Mr., uh JJ, I was told that you saw the thieves, and I’m just trying to determine the chain of events.”JJ breathed out. Relax! “Yes, uh, I was right here in this booth.”“Can you describe what you saw?”“I saw Santa Claus and his elf walking past really fast.” He looked into the blue eyes. “I guess I should say I saw two men dressed as those characters.”“Can you describe them?”“The Santa guy was kind of tall. As tall as you, but not as tall as me.”Star wrote. “So, about six feet tall?”“Probably, yes. The other guy was little. That’s one reason why I didn’t think anything strange. The elf was really small—like he fit the costume. I figured they were just rehearsing for the Winter Fantasy Santa’s Village.”“How small.”JJ held out his hand at the middle of his chest.“About five foot four?”“Yeah, or maybe smaller.”“But it was definitely a man?”JJ cocked his head. “Good question.”Again, that gaze speared him. “Close your eyes and picture the two of them and see if you remember anything that would indicate if the person might have been female.”JJ closed his eyes. Wow. The detective smelled good. Like citrus with some honey in it. A soft smell, not overpowering at all. Maybe he could just snuggle his head against Ryan’s neck and inhale deeply. “Ummm.”“Excuse me?”“Uh, sorry. The elf had big feet, and I think he had tennies under the elf shoe covering. I’d guess a man.” His eyes flew open. “Yes, Adam’s apple. The guy had one.”Detective Star smiled. Oh God of sweet homosexual love. Like flashing white perfection in that otherwise imperfect face. JJ’s cock leaped up in greeting. Hello, Starshine. The cop beamed at him. “Good job, JJ. Now what else can you remember?”Oh my, how he loved pleasing the nice detective.
Reader Reviews (5)
Submitted By: tonihip on Jan 26, 2014M/M romance with a hot in the closet (for good reason! or maybe not?) police detective and a flaming girly-boy interior decorator who is pretending to be a macho butch to attract the detective. So many kinds of wrong in this story which made it fun to read. 119 pages of silly misunderstandings but I still prefer 'Fire Balls' in this series.
Submitted By: ttkove on Sep 22, 2013JJ was an awesome protagonist! Loved his and Ryan's story!
Submitted By: juleslovesbooks on Jan 26, 2013I love this whole series! This book is really about appearances and being true to yourself. And it's very sexy!
Submitted By: Deblet on Jan 12, 2013I really enjoyed reading this book; I found the characters to be well developed and likeable. This is the first book I have read of this author, and I will definitely be reading more of her books starting with the first book in this series.
Submitted By: firstname.lastname@example.org on Jan 1, 2013I loved reading this book! Tara Lain's Balls series (?) is one of the best M/M series out there. She writes funny, smart characters, and smokin' hot sex scenes. I just wish she wrote faster-