The EX-Files

Damian hefted the rack full of dirty glasses onto the stainless counter. The guy they’d just hired as a dishwasher would take care of cleaning them in the morning. Damian’s shift had come to an end and thank God washing the dishes before he could leave was not part of it.

Back out front, he headed for the door to lock up and was surprised to find he wasn’t alone. He stepped behind Jane where she stood fumbling in her bag by the restroom door. “Hey, there. I thought you’d gone home.”

“I was trying to call a cab, but I don’t have a number. So I thought I’d call information but I can’t seem to find my phone in this stupid purse. Then I thought I could call on the payphone, but you don’t have a payphone. Then I needed to go to the ladies room.” Jane swept one arm toward the restroom, threw off her balance and swayed.

He reached out with both hands to steady her. “Whoa. Easy. And just so you know, I always have numbers for cabs behind the bar. I even would have called one for you if you’d asked me.”

When he was certain she was standing okay on her own two feet, he let her go, not that it was any hardship holding on to her. Not at all. Of all the women who came to hang out at his bar, Jane was always a pleasure to be around, not to mention to look at.

“I didn’t want to bother you. You looked busy, with that big…thing of yours.” Her face colored. “The thing you carried, not your big thing.”

Damian laughed. “Yeah, I got it. You meant the rack of glasses.”

“Yeah, that must be what I meant. Because it would be rude to talk about, you know, your other big thing.”

Usually drunks were annoying. However Jane being drunk was proving to be absolutely adorable. He smiled. “Oh, I don’t know. I never mind talking about any thing, my thing included, when it’s with a cute girl.”

A scowl creased her brow. “Unfortunately, I’m not a girl anymore.”

“You’re right. You’re definitely a woman.” A successful, smart, attractive, funny and very inebriated woman who he should be putting in a cab home rather than noticing how one of the buttons on her blouse had opened and he could clearly see the lace of her bra. She wasn’t big up top, but what was there was really nice. Huge tits, especially the fake ones, were overrated in his opinion.

Jane frowned and touched her head. “I think I had too much to drink.”

“Mm, hm. I think you’re right.” And that was his fault. He’d been having so much fun mixing drinks for them he hadn’t realized what the combination of liquors, as much as the amount, would do to two women. Candice had gotten into her cab fine. Drunk yes, but functioning, but Jane seemed to be handling the alcohol less well. He’d keep that in mind when pouring for her from now on. She required a lighter hand.
That thought had him thinking other far from bartenderly thoughts about his hands on her.

“Damian?”

“Yes, Jane.”

“I’m attractive, aren’t I?”

He nodded. “Yes, you are. Very.”

“Then why am I alone? I mean I’m not even talking about being unmarried. I mean alone like I burnt out the motor on my vibrator last week and now I have to buy a new one.”

And now he had a hard-on. Wow. That was some piece of information. It put a hell of a visual in his head. Jane, splayed out on her bed, working herself to an orgasmic frenzy.
Damn.