Lily Mine: A Historical Fantasy

They walked together to the main house just as the rain began to fall harder--she with her cloak wrapped around her and Lord Ashbourne at her side leading her along. She paused inside his door, in his breathtaking foyer. Her shoes were muddy from the damp ground and she couldn't see tracking the filth across the marble floor. Nor could she remove her shoes and trot into the parlor with her toes poking through her holey stockings. In the end she scraped them as well as she could upon the rush mat while she stared up the grand staircase, wondering where Hanover had carried her satchel. In the darkness now the chandelier hovered over them, cold cut glass illuminated by candlelight.

Lord Ashbourne was beckoning her into the parlor. She saw an arrangement of mums and marigolds on the broad low table. Her flowers. In the faint lamplight the room was still beautiful, but changed. In the dark it felt more intimate, almost magical in its gilt formality. The flickering flames of the lamps reflected off the vases and crystal. She felt she was in another world, a quiet, coldly beautiful world. As Lord Ashbourne went to secure the windows, she sat on the same divan she'd sat on earlier. The sharp pitter-pat of rain from outside faded to a distant sound with the thump of the glass panes closing. Just as he finished, Hanover returned with a tray of biscuits and tea. Lord Ashbourne looked at the tray and back at Lily.

"Perhaps you might bring a full supper for our guest, Hanover," he suggested in a quiet voice.

Lily was already shaking her head. "I couldn't put you to the trouble. It is so late."

"And some of the fresh bread Mrs. Gertrude baked today, if you would," Lord Ashbourne added, ignoring her protests.

"Yes, of course, sir." Hanover bustled off with a swish of coattails.

Her host sat on the divan across the table and poured tea. She accepted the warm cup with a mixture of dread and thankfulness. She shouldn't be here, but oh, the china cup was so delicate, and the warmth of the tea made her sigh. She knew he watched her as she cupped her hands over the warm brew and let the steam and piquant mint aroma curl up into her face, over her nose and cheeks. But she didn't care. It had been a week or more since she'd had a proper cup of tea.

He looked away and then back at her, shifting and putting his own cup down. "Miss Lily, I'm sure you are exhausted, so I will attempt to be brief. Well, as brief as possible about what I must admit is a very complicated request. I only ask that you hear me out completely with an open mind. I would like to propose an arrangement I believe could benefit us both."

Lily's eyes widened in surprise. "What type of arrangement?"

"Let me begin by sharing a secret. It is a very painful and personal secret I must entreat you not to share beyond these walls."

"Of course. I won't tell anyone."

He took a deep breath. "Perhaps this will shock you, but the lady supposed to be my wife, Lady Lilliana, left me some weeks ago and absconded with another man to the Continent."

Lily gasped softly and turned her gaze to the muddied tips of her shoes on the floor. She hadn't the slightest idea what to say to such a revelation.

"I know, it is a most untoward circumstance. Worse, her family is anxious to cover up the affair, as am I, obviously."

She looked up at him. He didn't look angry, just resigned.

"But…" Lily felt terribly outraged on his behalf. First his difficult financial situation, and now this. "Why do you not just make her come back and take her rightful place at your side? She oughtn't to be allowed to behave so."

"I cannot make her do anything, unfortunately, since she can't be found. Besides that, our marriage was fraudulent from the beginning. She had already eloped with her lover before she stood beside me at the altar to say her vows."

"How utterly wretched of her!" To participate in such a sacrilegious ruse--it was quite astounding that any woman could do such a thing, even for love. "I can only say… I can only say I'm sorry. That was not well done of her, sir. Not at all."

"Yes, quite. And her mother is beside herself. She is terrified of scandal. Never got over some long ago to-do with her sister, and now this disgrace just as her younger daughter is about to come out. She is desperate to hide this coil, and for myself, I am perfectly happy to not marry again for appearances. Only…if I have no wife…" He spread his arms in a helpless gesture. "It is difficult to maintain appearances. But it is the strangest thing, Lily. You look almost exactly like her."

"Do I?"

"When I first saw you, I was not quite certain you were not Lilliana come back in disguise."

"Oh, I am not her. I promise."

"Of course I realize that now. But your resemblance to Lilliana has given me the most striking idea."

Hanover swept back into the room with a tray heavily laden with roast beef, boiled vegetables, bread, cheeses, apples and grapes. He dropped it on Lily's lap, bowed to them both, and left. Lily looked down at the repast. It was more food than she'd seen in a week. There was no point in protestations or quibbling, as the unmannerly growl of her stomach gave her away. She picked up the utensils and began to eat. The roast was delicious, tender and perfectly seasoned, and the vegetables were crisp instead of soggy. She broke off a piece of the crusty bread and dipped it in the beef gravy. By God, it tasted heavenly. She would make herself sick because she would eat every morsel of what was on the tray.

"At any rate," he went on as she tucked into the food, "it occurred to me that this coincidence might not go to waste. How do you feel about playing the part of my absent wife? Just for appearances, of course."

Lily choked on the piece of bread she'd just swallowed, prompting Lord Ashbourne to jump up and pat her firmly on the back until the morsel dislodged itself.

"Oh! Ah… Lord Ashbourne, sir--" she managed when she caught her breath again.

"Please do not issue an abrupt denial until you consider." He took up a place on the divan beside her. "I would not, of course, expect you to act as my wife in anything other than name. In return, you could enjoy the comforts of Lilyvale Manor, and my London homes as well."
"Your London homes?" Lily nearly choked again.

"Yes. We would need to put in brief appearances now and again to keep the gossips at bay. But this would only be temporary, as I said. A temporary arrangement until Lilliana returns, or until her sister is happily launched and married, which could be as soon as next year. At that time, in thanks for your assistance, I would help you establish your horticulture business in any town or borough you wished. Greenhouses, flower shop, anything. Your own business to run as you see fit. I think it is a very good trade, Miss Lily…" His brows rose in a question.

"Kendall."

"Miss Lily Kendall. And do I assume correctly that you have no familial ties that would hamper such an arrangement?"

She bit her lip. Was it so obvious then, that she was unloved and alone in the world? "It is true my family and I are estranged."

"I'm sorry to hear that. But what I meant is that you are not married or possessed of any dependent children?"

He was so cool and composed, and she so agitated. Her own greenhouses and flower shop. She could barely comprehend the idea, and yet... "My lord, I have no family ties whatsoever at present. But this offer… I am not sure… I'm not certain I can accept."

"Why not? Do you not like Lilyvale? I know it seems an empty, quiet place. I released most of the staff when Lilliana left, for obvious reasons, but they can be hired back if you agree to pose as my wife."
So he was not impoverished after all, only humiliated in circumstance. Her heart ached for this poor man. Society demanded appearances be kept up at any cost--but the cost of her assuming the identity of another? It did not sit right with Lily's conscience.
"It is only that…you see…Lord Ashbourne--it seems terribly deceptive to me. It would be tantamount to living a lie."

"I understand your misgivings. However, I assure you the deception would be a passive one. Most of the time you could continue to be yourself. In fact, I would be rather disappointed for you to take on Lilliana's identity fully, as she turned out to be quite a reprehensible sort. Do please continue eating."

Lily looked down at the forgotten food on her lap with a jolt. Her appetite was gone. She was tense and her nerves were jangling. Think, think, Lily. Consider carefully. Dare you do this?

Lily managed another bite of roast and cooked carrot and thought about what he offered. Food, shelter, the life of a gentle lady, and when it was done, a business of her own. She could return to London and support her family. Or perhaps quieter Tunbridge could become the new family seat. Her sisters could run the flower shop while she worked to her heart's content in the greenhouse, tending and developing new flowers. She would even forgive her father for his heartless actions and invite him to join her as a partner again. She saw now how poverty and financial insecurity could bring out the worst in anyone. She understood his anger now.

And Lord Ashbourne had said I would not expect you to act as my wife in anything other than name. So her unfortunate ruination would not be an issue between them, and she would not be subjected to any more…ruin. It was a good idea except for one thing.

"Do you think they will all believe?" Lily asked doubtfully.

"Perhaps. Perhaps not. I assure you, the resemblance between the two of you is remarkable. If your appearances in the greater world are brief and well-handled, I see no reason for anyone to suspect you are not her. And here at Lilyvale, she was barely known to begin with. If I hire new staff, no one will guess you are not Lilliana in truth."

"But Hanover--"

"Hanover will say nothing. He is my most trusted servant, and well paid for his loyalty. Mrs. Gertrude, while an excellent cook, is advancing in dementia. Even if she does not believe, no one will take her claims as anything other than delusions."

Lily bit into a grape, the sweet juicy goodness unfamiliar and cloying. She might eat grapes all day and all night as his wife. Her tummy felt full for the first time in weeks and she was safe and warm and sheltered from the rain. How on earth could she say no?
She looked over at Lord Ashbourne, at his composed, almost resigned face, and his eyes that captivated her with their pale blue depths. He sat forward on the divan, his hands braced on his powerful thighs. The candlelight illuminated the sheen of his dark hair and the directness of his gaze. Lily Kendall playing wife to this man, this striking, distinguished gentleman. That was what made her hesitate. She rubbed her eyes, overwhelmed by the decision.

"If you like, you can consider first," he offered. "Rest and let me know in the morning. Or afternoon. Whenever you are sure."

He looked so tired. So sad. And so very handsome. Later, in the quiet comfort of the bedroom Hanover led her to, with the violent rain and thunder out of doors, Lily drifted to sleep thinking she would be an absolute fool to refuse.