Bodice Rippers & Carnie Strippers - Funny Poems About Love & Sex

Three Traditional Tales About Sex

1
I love you, she gasps
You’re a two-timing whore, he rasps
She slaps him in the face
He rips her bodice lace
Oh Sir, you cannot
Dot dot dot

2
Riding o’er the hills at sunset, Bonnie Face and Lightning Lad,
Wax moustachioed villain follows, yes, we know he’s really bad,
There’s a shoot out, in the gully, hero’s wounded, villain’s dead,
Sun it sinks behind the curtain, think it’s time for Bonnie’s bed,
See the shutters, see the shadows, drawing long o’er Bonnie’s cot,
Now she’s ready, now door opens, now it’s time for dot dot dot.

3
Ponytail upon her scooter, meeting Leather Biker Hunk,
Drive-in fodder, raunchy retro, healthy hunk of brawn and junk,
Hips together, getting steamy, will she yield or will she not?
Fifites brassiere, out of sweater, sweaty hands on dot dot dot.