A Sin to Confess: A Gay Coming Out
By: Mallorie Griffin | Other books by Mallorie Griffin
Published By: Mallorie Griffin
Published: Aug 05, 2012
ISBN # MLLGRF0000025
Published By: Mallorie Griffin
Published: Aug 05, 2012
ISBN # MLLGRF0000025
Word Count: 7,000
Available in: Epub, Mobipocket (.mobi), Adobe Acrobat
DescriptionDaniel is a young Catholic man, and he has a problem - a huge problem. He's lusted after one of his youth group members for months, and what's even worse, the person he's lusting after isn't a girl... it's a boy named Brandon.
To make matters even worse, Brandon teases him mercilessly, in all the right ways, while in a confessional on a field trip. So Daniel knows Brandon wants him in return, and neither of them can do anything about it. Or can they?
For mature readers only, due to graphic depictions of oral sex. 7000 words.
Reader Rating: Not rated (0 Ratings)
Sensuality Rating: Not rated
Excerpt:I turned, making my way back to the main area, but something caught my eye as I did so. A confessional. Suddenly, I felt overwhelmed by the need to confess. I had to let this out. If I could confess, I could get this sin out of me. Maybe things would be better, if I did that.
With wavering steps, I walked towards the booths cloaked in thick fabric, and then peered at the sign. “Shoot,” I muttered, the worst curse word I usually allowed myself to use. There was no priest on Saturdays. There would be no confession for me.
Still, I stepped inside the booth, brushing aside the heavy fabric. It was dark and claustrophobic inside the tiny space, but to me it was comforting, like God was wrapping me up in a tight hug. I would confess, even though there wasn't a priest to hear me, and maybe God himself would answer. Maybe he would tell me what to do about my sin.
I fumbled my hand in my pocket, and pulled out the rosary that I always kept there. I knelt on the ground and bowed my head, joining my hands and pulling them up to my face in the familiar prayer pose. I gave one deep breath. This would be the first time I ever confessed what I was about to say out loud. Even though there was no priest to hear me, I knew God would. I knew he could already see what was in my heart. I could only hope that he would forgive me.
“Forgive me Father, for I have sinned. It has been 6 days since my last confession,” I began, my voice cracking a bit. Even though I was whispering, I sounded too loud. My voice echoed off the narrow walls, bouncing back into my ears. I didn't want anyone to hear what I was about to say. Anyone but God, that was.
I lowered my voice to the barest whisper. “I have lust in my heart,” I said. “And what's worse, it's not for a woman. It's for a...” I trailed off, not wanting to admit it. If I said it aloud, it would be true, and that truth was painful. I couldn't be so warped, could I?
After many moments, I coughed, clearing my throat, and I tried again. “I have lust in my heart for another man,” I said quickly and quietly. There. I'd said it.
Oddly enough, I didn't feel any better. I was half-expecting God to do something, either in a blaze of glory or in a whispered voice. I wanted him desperately to tell me what to do about this. I wanted him to tell me how to fix myself.
But there was no answer. The only thing that filled my ears was silence, and the only thing that filled my eyes was darkness.
“I... I don't know what to do,” I continued with a stammer. “It's just that Brandon... he's so different. I've never felt this way about anyone before. Especially not a girl. Why would you make me like this? Why would you do this to me? Is this my burden?” I flinched, now half-expecting God's wrath on my back. It was so accusatory. Of course God made me this way for a reason. I just had to figure out why.
My eyes flew open at the rustling of fabric. I glanced towards the curtain. “What?” I said dumbly as a figure entered the alcove, the strange body just pushing its way inside and into my space.
“Stand up, dummy,” a voice hissed. It was Brandon, yet again.
“I...” I obeyed him, standing, and the next thing I knew, he was pushing me against the wooden wall of the confessional, his still sweaty body pinning me to the wall. “What?” My words had escaped me. I couldn't speak. I could hardly breathe.
“I heard everything,” Brandon continued, his voice still hissing, his breath hot and damp in my ear. “You have lust in your heart, do you?”
I wanted to be indignant. I wanted to rail against him, push him away from me. He wasn't supposed to hear that! But another part of me wanted to confess to him. Let him do to me what he wanted. I would take anything I could get from him, and I would love it, I was certain.
“Yes,” I finally managed to blurt out, and Brandon laughed. It was a sinister laugh, a laugh that made me blood run cold.
“You know what a sin that is,” Brandon said. Even as he spoke, his hands ran up and down my sides and waist, coming to rest lightly on my hips. “We could get in so much trouble.”
My heart stopped. I knew what Brandon loved more than anything was trouble. “But, we can't!” I raised my voice as I spoke. I couldn't get in trouble. I was already in too much, just for being me.
“I think it's a little late for that,” Brandon breathed into my ear, and then his bit it. Fire coursed through my body as he thrust, and I felt the unmistakeable hardness of his thick erection, pressing against my belly. Prudence gave way to lust, lust that I'd been bottling up for years, and I let out an involuntary moan as I grabbed his body, my own cock thickening quickly. I pulsed and ached for me. I wanted him. For once, my desire ran over my fear. I didn't care that it was a sin, I just wanted him to have me.
Brandon laughed lightly, and snaked a hand downwards, grabbing my cock through the fabric of my jeans and rubbing it. I felt like my knees were about to give out. I wanted him to make me come, right then and there.
A small sliver of decorum remained in my brain, however. “We... can't...” I gasped as he gripped harder. I thrust against him once more, even as I spoke, my body waging complete and total war against my mind. “Not in the confessional!”
“But I thought you said you wanted this,” Brandon whispered. “I thought you said that you had lust in your heart for me.”
I stared at him, and then I nodded. And then he kissed me.
It was intense. It was the single most intense experience of my young life. I moaned into his mouth as his groping tongue parted my lips, pushing its way inside my mouth, invading me. At first I resisted, but then I pushed my head forward, returning the kiss, our tongues mingling. I wanted more, far more from him. I never wanted this kiss to end.
But it had to end. Brandon pulled back, laughing. I gave out another groan as he stepped back and pulled away from me. My body felt achingly empty, and utterly unfulfilled. He was teasing me.
“Fine, have it your way,” he said, and I shuddered. I wanted to tell him no, I wanted to tell him to take me right here, right now. I want to suck him off. I wanted to feel that cock in my mouth, and wrap my lips around his thick shaft.
But I was struck mute by the suddenness of it all, and though I reached out for him as Brandon left the confessional, I didn't stop him. I was still so conflicted.
And now I was left alone, with a raging erection. What was I going to do with this?